Recently I have been contemplating loss in a new way. I have been thinking about what loss gives me- what it awards me. I recently faced a great disappointment and as I grappled with this loss, wrestling with sadness, frustration and anger, there came a moment when I suddenly felt grateful for it. In losing, I became a recipient of many rich and deeply satisfying gifts.

After weeks of processing with an array of grueling and awful feelings, a glorious moment was born where it all just came together in a beautiful light. The path of loss became, for me, a path of blessing. In fact, as I look back over my life, I can see this path emerging from many seasons of sorrow.

Disappointment leads me to an evaluation of who I really am and what my life is all about. Loss leads me toward a more meaningful and intentional existence.

Disappointment, the path to purpose.

Disappointment leads me to think on all those heroes in my life who have faced great disappointment and tragedy and yet, from cocoons of pain, glorious, awe-inspiring creatures emerged. These conquerors give me courage to believe, "I too can make it"

Disappointment, the path to transformation and hope.

Disappointment has opened my eyes to see the mundane and the messy in a new light. Crying babies, dirty footprints, stomach flu, and mounds of laundry all suddenly seem like treasures.

Disappointment, the path to new perspective and gratitude for life as I know it.

Disappointment and my most recent loss has led to support, comfort, condolence, reassurance, hands laced tight, ears attentive to my call, hearts ready to hold and feet in sync with mine.

Disappointment, the path to being loved.

Disappointment has led me to anger, hurling honesty at the sky, at God and this puts me face-to-face with the One who created and loves me, the One who holds my emptiness in His hands and fills my cavernous longing with Himself.

Disappointment, the path to Divine love and the deepest fulfillment.

Disappointment and grief has led me to empathize, groan and give in ways I would not have before with those who are hurting. Grief has led me to a place of longing to give comfort in the same ways I have received it.

Disappointment, the path to loving and serving others.

I don't enjoy pain. I don't like suffering and in fact, I dread and hate the road of grief. But it is a road that is undoubtedly embedded with treasure, treasure that the easy road does not always award. And if I imagine my life without these losses, then I must also imagine my life without the goodness and blessings that have come on the heels of such pain.

So, as I embrace this present disappointment in one hand and grieve honestly for the inevitable pain it leaves me with, I cannot deny that the other hand has been filled with new purpose, hope, transformation, love, perspective, gratitude and the presence and promises of God

Disappointment, the path to new joy and deeper living.